Tuesday, September 29, 2009
1984 Ghetto Prom Birthday Bash
Yes folks, we had another theme night. However while recently browsing over past blog titles, I realized I never posted Paulina's 25th Birthday Celebration from back in July. I figure at this point, pictures will do this blog more justice. Now let me introduce you to the Prom King Aaron and the Prom Queen herself: Paulisha!
Hooray!
It's official! A plane ticket has been booked with Colt's name on it for Christmas. He will arrive in Korea on December 23rd and depart on January 5th; two solid weeks of pure holiday family fun. I have no idea what we're going to do with ourselves but I couldn't be more ecstatic to have my brother around during that time of year. 13 weeks and counting!
30 is the new 20?
It's safe to say times are really changing and people are doing things much later in life than in years past. When thinking about my generation, most of our mothers and their mothers and their mothers, were married and having children in their early 20s. You were almost out casted or "looked down" upon if you were over the age of 25 and without one of the two. Certainly by the peak age of 30, you were doomed for a life of social annexation, spending most of your time alone at your favorite coffee shop.
But today things are much different. Although there are still those girls that dream of nothing more than getting married and starting a family, there are also plenty of women who are now career driven and filing thoughts of "happily ever after" in the over-stuffed cabinets stored in the back of their minds. Women today no longer feel threatened. We have become strong and independent...no longer in need of a man to fulfill every need. Instead, society as a whole has drifted into this power struggle of constant change and new trends that have given people either the strength to accept it all and keep climbing the ladder or spiral downwards, drowning in a pool of their own insecurities.
Life is all about having choices and making decisions. But what if the decisions you make are the wrongs ones? Now I'm a firm believer in existentialism - that there is no fate or destiny for each individual. I do believe the experiences you have determine the events that will take place in your life. So combining this frightening concept with the idea that people are doing things much later in life, I often find myself wondering... is there more than one "mid life" crisis in one's lifetime? Think about it. If people aren't really starting their lives until their mid 30s, do we now have more time to "freak out" as we wander aimlessly through our 20s?
Now I wouldn't exactly say I'm having a mid life crisis, especially at the ripe age of 23. But I can honestly say I've had many frantic outbreaks of "WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?" Most recently, I found myself saying those exact words here in Korea. It was a like a light switch went off. I went to sleep and woke up a different person. I like to think I'm doing okay but I have so many interests and desires and unfortunately society doesn't easily allow you to go in all directions (unless you are fortunate enough to have a rather large disposable income).
For instance, I'd love to start a trendy coffee/wine bar. Open a hip bed and breakfast. Be a food stylist. Study art and work at the MoMA. Travel the world and broadcast my adventures. I'd love to write a book. Design a shoe line. Perform on Broadway. Be a talent manager. Sing on American Idol. Work events on the cat walk. Be a personal stylist. Make clothing. Be a personal chef. The list is endless. I feel that as eclectic as I am with my own personal style, I am also eclectic with my dreams and aspirations. As I have all of these interests, and all in so many directions, I sometimes find myself in a constant hazy spin.
What I am describing is also what I consider to be one of those "crises". Is it possible to be 23 and having a "quarter-life crisis"? The answer is yes, because I can tell you my mind is always on a perpetual over drive. And I'm fairly certain I'm not alone in the matter. But I wonder, who made the rules? Why does it seem impossible to follow all of my dreams? It's moments like these where I have to step outside of my body and remind myself to breathe.
But am I really just avoiding the inevitable?
But today things are much different. Although there are still those girls that dream of nothing more than getting married and starting a family, there are also plenty of women who are now career driven and filing thoughts of "happily ever after" in the over-stuffed cabinets stored in the back of their minds. Women today no longer feel threatened. We have become strong and independent...no longer in need of a man to fulfill every need. Instead, society as a whole has drifted into this power struggle of constant change and new trends that have given people either the strength to accept it all and keep climbing the ladder or spiral downwards, drowning in a pool of their own insecurities.
Life is all about having choices and making decisions. But what if the decisions you make are the wrongs ones? Now I'm a firm believer in existentialism - that there is no fate or destiny for each individual. I do believe the experiences you have determine the events that will take place in your life. So combining this frightening concept with the idea that people are doing things much later in life, I often find myself wondering... is there more than one "mid life" crisis in one's lifetime? Think about it. If people aren't really starting their lives until their mid 30s, do we now have more time to "freak out" as we wander aimlessly through our 20s?
Now I wouldn't exactly say I'm having a mid life crisis, especially at the ripe age of 23. But I can honestly say I've had many frantic outbreaks of "WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE?" Most recently, I found myself saying those exact words here in Korea. It was a like a light switch went off. I went to sleep and woke up a different person. I like to think I'm doing okay but I have so many interests and desires and unfortunately society doesn't easily allow you to go in all directions (unless you are fortunate enough to have a rather large disposable income).
For instance, I'd love to start a trendy coffee/wine bar. Open a hip bed and breakfast. Be a food stylist. Study art and work at the MoMA. Travel the world and broadcast my adventures. I'd love to write a book. Design a shoe line. Perform on Broadway. Be a talent manager. Sing on American Idol. Work events on the cat walk. Be a personal stylist. Make clothing. Be a personal chef. The list is endless. I feel that as eclectic as I am with my own personal style, I am also eclectic with my dreams and aspirations. As I have all of these interests, and all in so many directions, I sometimes find myself in a constant hazy spin.
What I am describing is also what I consider to be one of those "crises". Is it possible to be 23 and having a "quarter-life crisis"? The answer is yes, because I can tell you my mind is always on a perpetual over drive. And I'm fairly certain I'm not alone in the matter. But I wonder, who made the rules? Why does it seem impossible to follow all of my dreams? It's moments like these where I have to step outside of my body and remind myself to breathe.
But am I really just avoiding the inevitable?
RENT
If there is anything you know about me, it's that I love the musical production of RENT. So when I heard a semi-original cast was coming to perform in Seoul, I was uber excited to say the least. Then when I found out it was their last world tour, I became saddened and I knew immediately this was an opportunity I couldn't pass up. I mean who wouldn't want to watch a musical where all of the characters are gay with AIDS in an extremely homophobic country?
Well despite that very true statement, I bought tickets to the first Saturday night showing. It was so surreal to me to be watching my favorite songs come to life before my eyes on stage! Hearing the voices of Adam Pascal and Anthony Rapp in person was nothing like I've ever experienced. Their voices are so distinct and they've been playing these characters for so many years that it seemed as though they had truly become them.
The success and popularity of RENT has changed the thoughts and feelings of so many closed minded people around the world and to such sensitive issues. I really stand behind its' message and I hope to see the production again one day. Or better yet, star as Mimi Marquez, my dream Broadway role.
525,600 minutes how do you measure
measure a year...
Well despite that very true statement, I bought tickets to the first Saturday night showing. It was so surreal to me to be watching my favorite songs come to life before my eyes on stage! Hearing the voices of Adam Pascal and Anthony Rapp in person was nothing like I've ever experienced. Their voices are so distinct and they've been playing these characters for so many years that it seemed as though they had truly become them.
The success and popularity of RENT has changed the thoughts and feelings of so many closed minded people around the world and to such sensitive issues. I really stand behind its' message and I hope to see the production again one day. Or better yet, star as Mimi Marquez, my dream Broadway role.
525,600 minutes how do you measure
measure a year...
Once a planner always a planner
One of my good friends Jon has recently decided to move back to the "real world" in the good ol' USA. His contract is about to expire and with the many options he has come to face of whether to stay an additional year or get another degree or go back to work, he has chosen to leave the country and head back to the states. Now you should know that although I've only known the man a few months, he has somehow become my "confidant" and a real true friendship has blossomed. I am admittedly sad for his upcoming departure but in the end, I only want what's best for him.
So there I was, planning my first "goodbye" party and the reality of it all was really sinking in. He is the first of the many friends that will be leaving over the next few months until my departure in early February. So all I could think of doing is what I know best...attempt to throw a smashing party and get the group together to say their goodbyes.
Amongst the many ideas, a simple afternoon picnic in the park and a night out in Seoul was in order. Jon's only request was that he would love to order custom T-shirts. Being the planner that I am, I put a smile on my face and attempted to make it all happen in spectacular fashion. Hopefully it'll turn out to be the exit he had in mind and that I'll be able to keep it together.
So there I was, planning my first "goodbye" party and the reality of it all was really sinking in. He is the first of the many friends that will be leaving over the next few months until my departure in early February. So all I could think of doing is what I know best...attempt to throw a smashing party and get the group together to say their goodbyes.
Amongst the many ideas, a simple afternoon picnic in the park and a night out in Seoul was in order. Jon's only request was that he would love to order custom T-shirts. Being the planner that I am, I put a smile on my face and attempted to make it all happen in spectacular fashion. Hopefully it'll turn out to be the exit he had in mind and that I'll be able to keep it together.
Monday, September 28, 2009
Saying Goodbye
It has finally hit me that I may never see the wonderful people I have met in my year long stay in Korea. The people I have seen on a regular basis, day after day, will no longer be a part of my life in the same way. Of course there has been discussion of "Korea Reunions" and there's always email and the good ol' telephone. But if there's anything I've learned about moving, it's that people change and people drift apart. The friendships I have tried to maintain since high school have mostly turned dull for the mere fact we all live our own separate lives now and don't really have all that much in common anymore.
Now I'd like to be the optimist and hope for the best, but deep down in the pit of my stomach, I know that is not realistic. I guess all I can do is hope for the best and hang on to the memories. Eventually you'll have people in your life where you can just pick up like no time was ever lost.
Someone once told me that in your lifetime, if you can count the number of true friends on your hand, you are a lucky person. I like to think that someday I'll be able to use my toes too. There's too many people I love out there and those I have yet to meet.
I just consider myself the lucky one to have them in my life.
Now I'd like to be the optimist and hope for the best, but deep down in the pit of my stomach, I know that is not realistic. I guess all I can do is hope for the best and hang on to the memories. Eventually you'll have people in your life where you can just pick up like no time was ever lost.
Someone once told me that in your lifetime, if you can count the number of true friends on your hand, you are a lucky person. I like to think that someday I'll be able to use my toes too. There's too many people I love out there and those I have yet to meet.
I just consider myself the lucky one to have them in my life.
A Sudden Change of Heart
For as long as I can remember (which actually isn't that long at all) I have had my mind set on staying a second year in Korea. I love this city and the adventures are endless. But I am finding myself asking if that is all truly worth it.
Before coming to Korea, I thought I had it all figured out. I was career driven and on a good track. But putting the life I was living on hold for a year has really opened my eyes to a lot of things. Was I really that happy? Was having no life of my own but that of my job really all that gratifying? For the first time in years, I am able to have a social life and a private life where my work stays at work and I don't have a cell phone glued to my hip, ringing at all hours of the night and day. Where I'm not driving a car with my knees, two cell phones in each ear, and my file in my lap. I am able to make plans for the weekend or go on vacation at a almost a moments notice. All of the luxuries a less demanding job allows.
So for months I've been set on not returning to the states. But now, I fear I may be making career suicide. A one year break in my career is easy to explain, but I would imagine a two year break makes me seem less marketable to a potential employer per say. So the circles I've found myself talking in, since my surgery has left me unable to move around quite as much, have led me to the decision of leaving the country. Now the question is will I leave right when my contract ends or will I stay and extend 3-4 months in preparation of coming home? There is a lot of money to be saved and a lot of things I want to try and fit in before my time is up. And now that there is an expiration date on my life as a Korean citizen, I'm feeling a bit stressed and overwhelmed.
So many choices and decisions to be made. Where should I go next? What job should I try and get into? With an unstable economy and a shocking unemployment rate, I'm not exactly looking forward to what lies ahead. All I know for sure is that wherever I go and whatever I do, I am starting completely over... and I kind of like that idea! Here's to turning a new leaf and hopefully finding happiness!
Before coming to Korea, I thought I had it all figured out. I was career driven and on a good track. But putting the life I was living on hold for a year has really opened my eyes to a lot of things. Was I really that happy? Was having no life of my own but that of my job really all that gratifying? For the first time in years, I am able to have a social life and a private life where my work stays at work and I don't have a cell phone glued to my hip, ringing at all hours of the night and day. Where I'm not driving a car with my knees, two cell phones in each ear, and my file in my lap. I am able to make plans for the weekend or go on vacation at a almost a moments notice. All of the luxuries a less demanding job allows.
So for months I've been set on not returning to the states. But now, I fear I may be making career suicide. A one year break in my career is easy to explain, but I would imagine a two year break makes me seem less marketable to a potential employer per say. So the circles I've found myself talking in, since my surgery has left me unable to move around quite as much, have led me to the decision of leaving the country. Now the question is will I leave right when my contract ends or will I stay and extend 3-4 months in preparation of coming home? There is a lot of money to be saved and a lot of things I want to try and fit in before my time is up. And now that there is an expiration date on my life as a Korean citizen, I'm feeling a bit stressed and overwhelmed.
So many choices and decisions to be made. Where should I go next? What job should I try and get into? With an unstable economy and a shocking unemployment rate, I'm not exactly looking forward to what lies ahead. All I know for sure is that wherever I go and whatever I do, I am starting completely over... and I kind of like that idea! Here's to turning a new leaf and hopefully finding happiness!
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